Thursday, March 07, 2013

Moving into a new dimension

We’ve been going through a rather uncomfortable patch lately.

At our last 21-week ultrasound, some alarm bells were raised. What they found was a thicker than usual nuchal fold measurement on our baby. The nuchal fold is the tissue at the back of an unborn baby’s neck. A nuchal fold measurement above the normal range is seen as an indicator of an increased chance of the baby having a chromosomal defect – i.e. Down Syndrome.

We were referred to see a specialist to verify the measurements and provide further advice if needed. The earliest appointment they could give us was not until the following week. Until then, we were left sitting in limbo, which was not a very comfortable place to be in.

During that week of limbo, my mind was filled with a whirlwind of a million what-ifs. I kept most of those thoughts to myself because saying them out loud even in a whisper was too unbearable.

In the midst of that whirlwind, a few thoughts bubbled to the surface…

~~~

Having children takes courage. It’s stepping into the unknown. It’s leaving behind a familiar place to journey into a whole new dimension.

What is this new dimension like? I cannot explain it to you. People living in a two-dimensional world can never comprehend what a three-dimensional world is like until they are there.

You will see a whole different side to life that you could never have imagined before. But until you see with your own eyes, a three-dimensional world sounds like a pretty scary place.

Will you have what it takes to be able to step into a three-dimensional world? Well the funny thing is that once you take that first step, you will find that you DO have what it takes to take that step. And the next one. And the one after that.

And before you know it, you cannot imagine living in anything less than a three-dimensional world.

~~~

And so, those were some of the thoughts that came to mind, as I pondered over the possibility of having a special needs child.

What would living in a four-dimensional world be like?

 

P.S. We eventually managed to see the specialist who assured us that the situation turns out not to be as dire as what we imagined. Since the initial ultrasound, the nuchal fold measurement appears to have stabilised. We still need to go back for another review in a few weeks to see how things are tracking, but we are in a much better place at this point in time.

4 comments:

  1. Hie Serene,

    I am a mum and I think I understands how you felt. While reading your post, I was kinda in your shoes and tears suddenly swelled up in my eyes. I feel for you. The uncertainty, the fear and the unknown.
    I am glad things are looking better.
    I can't do much but here I am in Penang, praying for you and your baby in your tummy.

    Hugs,
    Shu-Yin

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    1. Thanks for sharing your kind words, Shu-Yin. It's really encouraging and I truly appreciate it.

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  2. Hi Serene, wow I can't imagine how it must have felt that day/week. Praying for you and the bub. May all go smoothly from here...

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    1. Thanks somuch June. It's strengthening to have such support and prayers going out to us at this time.

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