Tuesday, August 17, 2010

Digressing to talk about ‘me’

I’d like to take a slightly different route on my ramblings today. For the past few months everything’s been pretty much all about pregnancy and babies. We’ve been shopping around for baby stuff, reading books and articles on the subject (well I have at least) and talking to people about it. I’m enjoying the whole experience, but sometimes I feel like the ‘me’ underneath it all has been getting a little lost in the midst of all this. Even when talking to people, the first thing people always talk or ask about is the pregnancy… can’t blame them as it’s hard to ignore the bump staring straight at you… plus it IS the main thing on my mind anyway.

Pretty much most of what I do throughout the day works around ‘the bump’. From the moment I wake up I have to get out of bed a different way, to picking the clothes I wear, the food I eat, trying to stay comfortable in my office chair all day and so on. And the little fella really knows how to make his presence known… he’s quite a mover and shaker. I feel intermittent jerks and flips in my belly throughout the day.

This morning, I played some classic Don Moen tunes in the background while I grappled with some Excel worksheets. And you know what? Those oldies still rock! Well, maybe ‘rock’ is not the word to describe Don Moen’s style, but it was great! For a few minutes I had a mini argument with myself of whether this was simply a nostalgia kind of thing and how I should guard myself against falling into a worship tune simply because it was a familiar one as opposed to some of the less familiar tracks from the latest Hillsong album.

But it’s difficult to separate yourself from feelings that just surface unexpectedly. I am after all human. It can’t be that wrong to reflect back on a song that touched you, the same way one might journey back to the memory of a favourite song or place shared with one’s husband/wife/boyfriend/girlfriend etc.

So please indulge me for a bit as I talk about memories associated with songs from this album:

My memories of this album are always closely associated with images of me doing this:

Our creative efforts in those days are a far cry from the hip-hop and contemporary moves of the youths today. But we really put our heart and soul into the choreographing and making sure each thing we did was meaningful and worshipful. Back in '96 (or was it '97) we actually choreographed dance steps for almost every song in the 'God With Us' album as the BCCM Chinese Service at that time was organising a worship night based entirely on that album, and we were asked to accompany the music and singing with dance.

This is one of the songs I remember really putting thought into aligning the meanings of the words with the steps:

Some of the steps I remember...

  • All we like sheep = holding shepherd's crook in hand
  • Have gone astray = hand movement to show 'going astray'
  • Each of us turning our own separate way = turning our bodies in different directions

We were so earnest and serious at making sure we did a good job. But we had so much fun at each of those practice sessions too.

[Digressing a bit: Sometimes in the moments before I got pregnant, I used to wonder when our baby would come. I reconciled it to the fact that God already has set the time and places for each of us to be born. So I view it as God already ordaining the time in line with the people he will meet and friendships he will forge. And boy, I sure hope his friendships will be as great as the ones I've been privileged to have!]

After all that reminiscing over 'old songs', let me close with sharing the lyrics from this title track from Don Moen's latest 2008 album. I think the lyrics are a really good reflection of not only looking back, but also looking forward to believe God for more...

You have been good to me

You have been gracious

You have been faithful…

Still I believe there is more

So open my hands to receive

All that Your love has in store

1 comment:

  1. LOl just watched the video...really does bring back memory doesn't it? I actually still remember the words to this song :)


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