Thursday, September 18, 2008

Multiple Roles

I feel so drained and flat. And I feel so bad that I would even complain about it or even mention it. Surely there are hundreds of other people busier than me and yet manage to stay positive and energetic through it all.

I always cringe when people come up to me and say in their 'sympathetic' voice, "wah, you look soooo tired, Serene.......". Do I really look that terrible? It makes me feel so inadequate. Sigh.

I'm always amazed at my friends who can juggle multiple roles... e.g. in their career, as a wife/mother, domestic goddess, in ministry etc. While I clumsily drop balls all over the place... can't even keep up with finishing everything at work on time to get home at a decent time to cook a decent meal. I still haven't finished making the one prop I'm in charge of for Search for a Star. The house is a mess. And just now I kena big time from hubby because I left two mobile phone bills overdue until my account got temporarily suspended! (yalor, I got a new phone from my company, but now I can't even really use it yet! *geram*)

I feel like Im gonna collapse from having to switch different roles throughout the day and week, from work, to wife/chef/homemaker, to doing worship/prayer/etc. at cell group. Hopefully I don't end up mixing everything up one fine day!

And I know... I knoooooooow... (as hubby 'lectured' me just now) that there's no point explaining my situation because EVERYBODY in the whole damn world is also busy... who am to act as if I'm so special or different in some way?

Can't even imagine adding 'mother' to my list of multiple roles! (I can already see the 'I told you so' look from hubby).

So sorry. This is such a whiny and pathetic post. Thank you for having the patience to actually read through all the above. I hope I can get a better grip of myself soon. Otherwise there might be many more posts like this to come and then lose all your readership and interest. So I will try, not only for my own sake, but yours too!

3 comments:

  1. Although other people might look good, maybe they are crumbling beneath. A lot of things are just a fascade. Be assured that you are not alone in feeling this way. Really.
    Actually i have always thought that you are a superwoman, just like how you look at other women and think why can't i be like them.
    You are you, and everyone is different in the way they handle things, and different in the load that they can handle.
    I think you are at the utmost busy phase now, that is why you are tearing your hair out. The phase may pass after search for a star. If it is prolonged busy phase, perhaps you can sit down and prioritise.
    You need some time to reward yourself too. Do something you like, even if it is for an hour or two.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Thank you for the encouragement. I'm surprised anyone would ever see me as a 'superwoman'. But I guess like what you said, what we perceive of others may be different from reality.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Hey Serene,

    actually I do look at you and go 'wah...she's juggling so well. got time to cook some more and do interesting things around the house'

    You're not alone my dear. believe me. *hug*

    love

    ReplyDelete

Thanks for taking the time to comment - I love reading every single one of them! Although I may not be able to reply to each comment, I will definitely pop over to your blog to say hello.

I love hearing from readers and fellow bloggers alike. If you're a little shy or would like to get in touch with me directly, drop me an email at serenely@outlook.com