Monday, May 22, 2006

Lifelong commitment

The common question now everytime I meet up with friends and relatives is... "so when is your baby coming?".

I always give a nice answer... "not so soon", or "we haven't thought about it yet", or "we're just enjoying this stage of our marriage for now".

I try to take it lightly as it's just the natural progression of things people assume... after getting married it's basically the next logical step right?

I try not to resent the jabs and jokes and knowing looks from these well-meaning friends and relatives... still part of me can't help being a little irritated...

Currently, the latest version of my response to such questions is "I'm not psychologically prepared for it yet". Sometimes it stumps them for a moment... so are we having kids or are we not? But I decided to give this as my most frank answer... because really, that's exactly how I feel...

Sometimes I wonder if most people ever really consider the whole gravity of bringing a child into the world... it seems so easy for them to just go "ok, we've been married XX months/years, now it's time for kids, let's do it!".

But for me... so many thoughts flit through my mind... my whole lifestyle will have to change... think of the money involved... we'll be stuck with them for the next 20 years at least...

OK OK OK... I know I'm just focusing on the negative side there... there is the upside of course and the immeasurable joy of having children blah blah blah... BUT my point is that this is indeed a VERY SERIOUS undertaking... not be taken lightly. This is a LIFELONG COMMITMENT... sort of the same reason I take marriage so seriously as well.

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