Tuesday, May 31, 2005

Parent influence on love life

A dear friend has just spilled her awful news to me… she and her bf* are now on the verge of a break-up. His last words to her during their most recent argument were “I don’t think I like you as much anymore”

I truly feel for her… I really do…

(*NOTE: She is Chinese and he is Caucasian)

But I felt from the start that it might end this way… and I feel a little guilty for feeling that way. Perhaps it was my silent disapproval or lack of inner support for this that may have contributed to this end. “Nonsense!!!” Okay, but that’s just how I feel.

White people may discriminate against Asians. But I suppose we Asians discriminate against them just as much too.

My parents have hammered into me since I was young not to have too much faith in the faithfulness of ang-mohs. They were not built for commitment and sacrifice… two very important foundations for a good relationship and a lasting marriage.

So although I could admire the dash and charisma that seem to hover around Caucasian men. I don’t think I was ever capable of falling in love with one of them. Through it all, I only saw all that as a false front.

Don’t ever deny that your parents have nothing to do with your feelings for the love of your life. Because their influence seeps in deeper than you could every realise.

Indians are --- CENSORED ---

Malays are --- CENSORED ---

So that only leaves, Chinese.

And it’s ironic that I can’t even speak our native tongue.

God help my Chinese husband.


  1. There's a Malay saying " Taqk kenal, maka tak cinta." Much of our prejudices stem from our ignorance and thus we fear the unknown. I don't know about "ang mohs" as i have very little dealings with them ( and much from the Holywood version) However, I can testify that I have some of the most hardworking and committed Malay staff in my office. My good friend is an Indian... which goes to say that one can't make sweeping statements. I feel for your friend.

  2. Booger...!! booger...!! booger...!!

  3. There are concerns that my sweeping statements will cause a riot. Perhaps I was being too insensitive. Herewith I am censoring my statements although I may not withdraw the statements because they are simply my personal opinions and experiences.

  4. Hey, fortunately you deleted the para deemed unfriendly. I don't remember giving this kind of comments about the other non caucasian people. Could be some of your friends down south !I consider myself not the racist type. To speak against certain people due to cultural incapatibity. That i agree.


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